1.31.2006

still processing...

last night was all about tears & cleansing.

thought about some things i haven't in awhile. had some revelations...

this year is going to be about renewal, facing fears. jumping over hurdles i've put in my own way.

i'm not a fearful person. so going thru these ordeals has been very trying. it's like i look in the mirror some days and don't recognize myself. blank, dreamless sleeps. crying jags that split me in half.

i've been energized in the last few weeks. empowered. but i've also been broken down.

feeling alienated frightens me. so does boredom.

i wanna write more about this, but the words just won't come. i can't rush this...whatever it is.

so i suppose i'll just ask for the strength to navigate it and go from there...

ashe.

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