i'm really feeling jo nubian on this one...
it's a good reminder that the straight-up abusers and liars are not the only men to watch out for. although those men do a good bit of damage on the social/macro level, the signs of that behavior are far more obvious.
on the personal/micro scale, it can be the ones who think they have it all together; the ones who have been able to mask insecurities with a variety of talents and levels of conversation. "good" guys capable of stagnating or ruining relationships through a lack of emotional intelligence, self awareness, and triggered behavior.
that's the situation i've had to break away from, and the one i'm terrified of encountering again.
i'm worried about the boys running around with man-masks on...who've never been challenged, called out, or touched deeply enough to know what's lurking under their facades.
from here on out, i can love them in the abstract--as my brothers in the struggle.
but that's as far as i'm willing to go.